Director: Justin Lin

Starring: Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster, John Cena

Primary genre: Action

READ ALSO

Returning Justin Lin to the director’s chair of the franchise that he helped built seems the logical step after the underwhelming “Fate of the Furious” (2017) (helmed by F. Gary Gray) and Lin’s own “Star Trek Beyond” (2016) misfire.

Falling prey to the franchise’s own established mythos of impossible feats and circumstances, officially “F9” can be seen as a parody. Replicating pseudo moral stances about life, the Fast saga (as it shamelessly proclaims to be), keeps digging and intercutting the past of every character, nullifying in the process the dramatic weight of previous events. With Diesel steering the creative wheel, his efforts to expand the drama of his family have reached ridiculous levels considering that everything started with a simple “Point Break” (1991) homage.

Relying on the chasing McGuffin after McGuffin story formula, at this stage “F9” is an overblown soap opera with decreasingly intriguing set pieces that numb the brain with their obvious stupidity - cars can ride on falling wooden bridges(!), used as a lasso or even and why-the-hell-not go to space while violating every single international treaty and arrangement between countries. It is clear though that none of these matter and despite the film’s attempts to justify the ridiculous proceedings, the uneven tone prevents “F9” to be an OTT ride.

Even the cast seems tired and disbelieved with the far-fetched story. The plethora of characters make it even worse as they all struggle to get screentime. Yet the biggest sin is the much hyped return of Han; which is so ridiculously shoehorned that makes the third and seventh entry pointless. Vin Diesel continues to be on autopilot unable to convince even an ant of Dom’s pathos, while the rest seem to be waiting their turn to talk when the Diesel machine stops uttering absurd lines.

There are still glimpses though of that chemistry that made the fifth, sixth and seventh entries great. Amping up the female roles this time around and avoiding relegate them to line delivery machines, it is cool to see girls having a fair share of the action even if the choreography seems too impractical for them to handle. Rodriguez brings a more female approach to her Letty while Ramsay’s and Brewster’s roles have been given extra layers to render them more dimensional. Kurt Russell, Helen Mirren and Charlize Theron clearly have a blast with their extended cameos and it is up to John Cena to deliver the goods in the villain department who unfortunately, has the menacing charisma of a cucumber unconvincing as a master thief. The absence of chemistry with Diesel makes matter worse and there is surprisingly limited to none use of his wrestling background in his banal action scenes.

Justin Lin brought true action craftmanship in the fifth and sixth entry but that now has been replaced with glorified and distracting CGI close ups of actors pretending to be on moving vehicles. The set pieces already look outdated (e.g., “Deadpool 2” (2018) has a similar set piece four years ago) and despite an interesting sequence that involves magnets, it disintegrates once you start wondering their various range and power depending the script’s requirements. The obvious use of green screen and digi doubles subtracts most of the charm in a franchise that relied heavily on practical stunts. With people flying off left and right and landing on concrete without a single scratch, the action is anemic and less engaging, a far cry of the vault heist of “Fast Five” (2011) or the car flipping in “Fast & Furious 6” (2013).

Lacking charismatic support from heavyweights such as Johnson and Statham, you might remember why the previous entries were more successful and more fun. Bearing a feeling of micro-management by Diesel’s ego, “F9” considers heavy handed exposition, rectified plot threads and mediocre staged action sequences as high art. Crumbling under the weight of trying to keep up with a constantly rewritten story retrospectively, “F9” has officially nuked the fridge. It can be seen as pure comedy though.

+Glimpses of great cast chemistry

+Larger female roles

+Russell, Theron, Mirren

+Some of the action is ok

-Convoluted story/ soap opera

-Obvious CGI in action scenes

-Uninteresting villain

-Too many characters

-Treatment of Han’s return

-Lack of thrills